I often think about isolation. Yes, I am already isolated but is it enough? And by the way, what am I talking about? Isolation from the cold? Obviously not. I am talking about isolation from society.
Last time I left my house was yesterday. I attended a poetry class and then went to an art gallery to see my crush and her paintings. I had to talk to a few people on the way and it was definitely overwhelming. I just couldn’t find an excuse to leave the place immediately.
This led me to think: Would I be happier in a more isolated place? If I moved to a rural village, learn how to do woodworking, etc. get some sheep or goat and dogs as friends and live a silent, modest life, would it be better for me?
Depression has the power to destroy my social skills. I leave my house once a week and talk to nobody unless I have to. And when I talk, I usually don’t make sense. When I’m talking to myself, everything sounds better. Perhaps, I just can’t deal with reality.
When I look at the situation, it seems like my depression treatment might take a bit longer. It’s already been a few years and I haven’t gotten anywhere. But if I move to a rural land to live off-the-grid, I’d have to “work” to get my food. By working, I mean plowing the farm and gathering fruits from trees, milking a cow, etc. Daily work of a farmer. Maybe, I’m not the problem, maybe the society and the system are the problems and I am resisting to not assimilate by depression. Depression is a mental reaction to the life around us and it is a warning. I’m thinking a lifestyle change may solve my problem.
What do you think? Please comment.